But Did You Break Up Though?: The Games We Play or Why We Stay

Over the last two weeks, there has seemingly been a theme among my clients and friends. It seems that folk are ready to break up. But of course, there are lots of barriers in the way to doing it right, because people are usually scared of the process. For those who don’t know, breaking up does NOT mean ghosting, hitting someone with the slow fade, making them mad enough to break up with you, or talking about how you need time to grow and that one day you might come back. When we break up, we do it right, we do it clean, and don’t leave false hope, or tarnish our character in the process.

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Nappily Ever After: A Critical Black Sex Therapist Review

I feel like I have been talking and attempting to write about the Netflix movie Nappily Ever After a lot lately. In the Sex Talk After Dark, Shayla Tumbling and I discussed the movie and the impact of hair on sexuality. I am glad to have had the discussion, but I have also been wondering why this movie is so hard to write about. For those who have seen it, feel free to proceed. For those who haven’t and are okay with spoilers, you do the same. IF you are NOT into spoilers in anyway, it might be time to hit the “x” in the upper left hand corner because spoilers are definitely ahead!

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Intergenerational Self Esteem

Often when we think of self-esteem, we think it happens on an personal level and that nothing interferes with it. Believe it or not, self-esteem is a concept that must be taught and is taught unintentionally and intentionally. The unintentional teaching of self-esteem usually teaches us how to have the lowest self-esteem possible. As a teen, this is happening on a variety of levels in every environment they enter.

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On the Eve of Cuffing Season

Finally, that crisp September air is here! With the changing of the season in a week and all of our Autumn plans coming a whole lot closer, we know that cuffing season has arrived!!! With cuffing season usually seems to come a whole lot of expectations and the close kin, miscommunication. You know we have to work on that. Let’s talk about expectations and communication in cuffing season.

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The Gaps to Your Orgasms: Where They Are & How to Find Them

A couple of weeks ago, on the eve of the new month, September, a podcast episode for Kings of the Heart release, with yours truly as a guest! We were talking about The Orgasm Gap, or in other words what is and where does the barrier lie that many women are not able to experience orgasm. So let’s talk about why women aren’t able to orgasm.

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Shame Shame Shame has no place in parenting

The path to end parent shaming was an interesting one for me. With my goal of helping create a society that doesn’t condemn every parent for every mistake they make, I have forged a message and a voice that feels so far removed from the emotionally abused girl I once was. Growing up in the type of home that I did, with the history I have, makes it almost impossible to believe that I am here – as a professional, as a healing voice for parents, and as a sane woman capable of love (both giving and receiving). But, alas, here I am, on a mission to create a shame-proof parenting framework that will change the way we think about parenting.

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A Lesson in Power: The Friend Zone

It's not so much a power exchange, which I think could be a great thing within relationships and relational interactions, but it's more in the context of having and keeping the upper hand to have dominion over the relationship. So in a sense, some are seeking to be G God while their partner would remain a peasant sent do their bidding. Power. 

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Turn the Page: The Girls Guide to Sex Education

I read the self-help book called The Girls' Guide to Sex Education: Over 100 Honest Answers to Urgent Questions about Puberty, Relationships, and Growing Up by Michelle Hope. Let me be the first to say, this is not an area I often venture into. However, when you get to meet the author and hear why she created a book, even if it is not exactly directed at you, you read it!

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